Wednesday, December 26, 2007

Yes i know its been a long time. Anyway, i was you-tubing and decided to, instead of the usual great female singers, celebrate the voices of man. yeah yeah whatver. anyway this are some great songs and voices of guys.

Cos i love Hannah Montana. This is the acoustic version of "See you again". His voice is real dreamlike.


This is half-counted. Its the same guy as above singing, but with this chick Sophie Hiller doing back-up. Its awesome. I love the song by the way.


One of my favorite songs. The guy has a huge mouth


De toi a moi. Just so you know. Yes its Jesse McCartney. I stumbled upon this and thought their voices complement real well, and i love the frenchlanguage thing.


And my boys.


HAHA.

Sunday, October 21, 2007

Updates. Upstarts. Up and On.

it's been a long hard road till here since.

life is seriously quite shitty right now. only God knows how many times and people i've complained to about how i hate everything that is going on right now. if not for my penchance for brighter colours now, i would seriously be so depressed. there is like so much turmoil and frustration waiting to break free, unfold in the moment of breaking. so right now i'm just drowning myself in everything i do. SHIT HAPPENS.

we recently got back out results for promos. it's a long story, but in the end i got promoted. i was kinda disappointed that that happened. i know loads of people would be like "whatever" and all, but honestly when i first got my results, i thought i would so get retained. i had gotten only Es for history and lit, and S for Ki. i expected a U for econs, so that would have all totalled up to 25points, which would have gotten at best only conditional promotion (35 being the promotion point). and conditional was just not good enough for me. and this i could accept after the initial shock. i mean, i was all ready and even geared up to leave stinking jc and to move ON to poly to do mass comm and all. and then came the shocking twist worthy of a chinese drama serial. i had gotten 36 points in the end. the changes were that i had gotten S for econs (worth 5points) and E for Ki (an additional 5 points). when i heard and saw that i got promoted, honest to God i was quite disappointed. cos' my agreement with my parents was that i could only leave jc if i got retained. i had changed and cleared my mind from all this shit, to only be put back into it. for the record, i absolutely loathe jc. every single morning, i literally struggle to pull myself up to go to school. i do hope that as school closes in a week or so, i do get refreshed mentally and all, and that in the new school term next year, things will change for the better.

anyway. apart from academics everything else is ultra boring and stagnated ( and private) . Sam was telling me that we need girlfriends. the school holidays are going to be superbly busy (i've only 7 free days) due to council. i do miss water polo so much.

time has flew and the end of the year is nearing. this year has only sucked, and nothing good has come out of it. i mean the people in school are nice and all, but that's it, they're just nice, decent kids. (read: boring). i mean, without them, my life could have functioned pretty well without them. i think its the recluse in me that's finally rising up. and also because of the stupid shit i get from them. the ivory-towers they reside in, ultra self-righteous and critical. i mean, do i give a shit whether i missed lessons and let that affect you? you gotta be kidding. and still, i told sam that what has it going on for jc is the people. ironic huh. oh well, its just life.

By the way, this video and the petition it represents gets my stamp of approval. i'm not going to bother to explain my choice, i'm really too tired to do so. but still, as a cosmpolitian and advanced society, should we not be open to people's choices and preferences?


Marie Digby - Unfold

This song is super surreal. As i read the lyrics, (and licked my potato-chipped fingers), i felt like i was looking at a mirror. for all the times that i've withdrawwn away, put up those walls, this song talks about it all. i was talking to Mishuelle a long, long time ago (miss you babe), and she said she realised that i have so many good/close friends, but no one that i've ever poured my heart to ever. somehow even with my best friends, there are those walls that come up when someone ever comes near. thats why, you might know me, but don't Know me. this song is so good in expressing how i feel about it all, the frustration, the fear and yes, the insecurities.




Unfold -

what i can remember
is alot like water
trickling down a page
of the most beautiful colors
i can't quite put my
finger down on the moment
that i became like ... this

you see, i'm the bravest girl
you will ever come to meet
and yet i shrink down to nothing
at the thought of someone
really seeing me
i think my heart is wrapped around
and tangled up in winding weeds

but i don't wanna go on living
being so afraid of showing
someone else my.. imperfections
even though my feet are trembling
and every word i say comes stumbling
i will bare it all.. watch me unfold
unfold

these hands that i hold
behind my back are
bound and broken by my own doing
and i can't feel
anything, anymore
i need a touch to remind me
i'm still real..

my soul
it's dying to be free
i can't live the rest of my life
so guarded
it's up to me to choose..
what kind of life i lead.

cause i don't wanna go on living
being so afraid of showing
someone else my.. imperfections
even though my feet are trembling
and every word i say comes stumbling
i will bare it all.. watch me unfold
unfold

i will allow someone to love me
i will allow someone to love me...

love me.. love me...

Thursday, October 18, 2007

Esmee Denters

Yes more hot female singers with oh-so-good voice. watch till the ends for both videos. you might get surprised.



Monday, October 15, 2007

Wednesday, September 19, 2007

PRE-EXAMS DEPRESSION

okay, so it's been awhile since we last met, and the power of the written word is evidently still strong and persuasive. the floods of posts around the blogosphere for exams encouragements and the like has prompted me to join the bandwagon. anyway, the promos are in a few days and the books are untouched, dusty and calling out. kudos to all who have opened theirs; hope you do well. for others in the same boat (sinking as PrisSu would call it), RETAIN is ever the likely option, or rather fate. but in the same manner i don't go to school, the unfeeling/apathetic/numbed heart of mine still reminds that life's too short for me to bother; i could die of worry. the clocks a-ticking, but somehow, my brain is miles away, unwilling and unwanted.

Wednesday, August 29, 2007

The EMOooo debate

yes, i'm so over emo. but anyway, while doing EoM, i came across this two articles, one the original, the latter the counter. anyway, i though the latter was a bit harsh on the orginal author, but otherwise made sense. the original, quite hate-filled, made a teeny weeny bit of sense, in the part where emo kids diss mainstream music,et al. anyway, haha, it's more so that i don't have to blog anything.haha.


Emo Kids and Their Useless Contributions to Society
Welcome to Wonderland
By Eugenia Wong
Staff Writer
In my LJ101A workshop, one of the coolest things that I learned about some of the greatest literary journalism pieces was the construction of the composite character.

So, I’m going to share with you my experience with a typical, bratty emo kid, whom I will fondly call, Josh Carrion the Emo Kid. Angsty Josh and Co. travel in hoards, infesting movie theatres, plaguing concert venues and contaminating the very air we breathe when we pass by them. However, before I move on any further, I will make the disclaimer that Josh Carrion is a composite character. Yet, a character we’re all too familiar with.

So, I’m sitting down at a general meeting for a community service club that I’ll just call Square K. Before the president arrives to give his spiel of upcoming service events, I’m checking up the latest update on PerezHilton.com. Yeah, I’ve been sucked into the world of celebrity trashings and thrashings (like you haven’t noticed from my other columns) but, hey, can you really say that you’ve never picked up a People Magazine before or at least been intrigued by a cover of US magazine? That’s what I thought.

Anyway, I happen to find something hilarious on the blog and share it with some friends in the club when I am so rudely interrupted by Josh the Emo Kid who retorts, “Why do you care about that stuff? It’s so… meaningless.”

Let me tell you something, Emo Kid, I think your face and your whole existence is meaningless. You swagger in with your ripped, skinny emo jeans, studded belt and greasy dyed hair that covers 2/3 of your face (a good thing it does too) being an unproductive member of society that just bitches, moans and butt into my conversation? Whatever, I clench my fist and refrain myself from snatching those trendy box-framed glasses from off his face and crushing them. I then proceed to turn on my iTunes to enjoy a few songs by OK Go. Oh, great, I have now unwillingly entered the battle arena of music as soon as the first few chords blast from my laptop because then emo kid comes along and says, “OK Go? Oh, they’re good but I liked their first album better.” In my mind I’m grateful that I didn’t have to listen to one of his idiotic rants about music that most emo kids like to go off on, so I politely reply, “Yeah, they’re good.” Ah, finally something that we can agree on but I spoke too soon because then Josh the emo kid goes off on how Capitol records had forced OK Go to wear their retro clothing, how he “discovered” the band long before their “A Million Ways” dance made them popular and how he “hates all mainstream stuff.” Oh my goodness. Emo kid really thinks that wearing “vintage” Salvation Army clothing, listening to weird ass music that no one has ever heard of or cares about, really makes him that unique. Get a life, emo kid... or better yet, take a shower. Before I could respond as to how I saw his exact sweater in a few pages of last year’s Teen Vogue magazine, the president arrives to the meeting thus signaling Josh the emo kid to shut his pie-hole and sulk in the corner.

A little over a week passes by but I happen to run into Josh the Emo Kid amongst all the other Josh the Emo Kids at a Chain Reaction concert on Friday night. Don’t get me wrong here, I don’t hate everything emo, I’m still a fan of emo bands like Mae and such. Otherwise, I wouldn’t be at the Chain. We exchange quick glances of acknowledgement, but I’ve already had enough of Josh the Emo Kid so I dash into the record store nearby only to be surrounded by a group of 12-year-old Josh the Emo Kids. They’re about a head smaller than me but I couldn’t help but be amused by their fake lip studs and coerced downtrodden voices. However my tender feelings for these youngsters quickly evaporated as soon as they started to complain how life was such a drag due to what their parents force them to do, which were mostly chores and other things that most American kids do. Is life really that hard, lil’ emo kid? Maybe if your parents put you up for adoption, then you would be justified in being emo. Whatever, I left the record shop in disgust and headed over to the Chain Reaction to enjoy some music where I met up with Emo Kid and crew.




Letters to the Editor
By Readers
Hate Against Emo Kids Unjustified
Last week I read an article in the paper titled “Emo Kids and Their Useless Contributions to Society,” (Feb. 26). Even as someone who is not “emo” and doesn’t listen to emocore, I have never read a more infuriating article in the New University. Never did I expect to come across an article that attacks a group not based on their beliefs but on the way they dress, the music they listen to and the way they live their lives.
When I read “Get a life emo kid. … Better yet, take a shower,” or “I think your face and your whole existence is meaningless,” the comparison that stood out most readily in my mind was the attack on hippies during the 1960s.
In addressing the article, I’d just like to pick out my favorite little bits. First, the author angrily asserts that emo kids “travel in hoards, infesting movie theaters, plaguing concert venues and contaminating the very air we breathe when we pass by them.” Now that is a lot of hate, and it’s just the beginning. The author somehow comes up with the idea that emo kids are a useless contribution to society. How can anyone make such a broad and ignorant assumption about a group of people? How is it that these attacks can come from an educated person?
There is a clear and violent bias in the article which, in my opinion, stems from the fact that the author clearly knows nothing about emo or emocore and its origins. I wonder if the author could have gotten away with this “opinion column” (which is really more like a “two minutes hate” a la “1984”) if she had criticized the majority culture, which everyone and their cousin seems to embrace no matter the occasional stolen melody or rhythm.
Josh Carrion, the “composite character” in the article (the fact that it’s a composite character makes it more of an attack on a group), makes the claim that OK Go had a better first than second album. This seemed to me like a perfectly innocent way to begin a conversation. Sure, many may take the emo kid to be haughty or above it all, but the way the author seems to turn this point into a tirade on anything independent negates this point. “Emo kid really thinks that wearing ‘vintage’ Salvation Army clothing, listening to” – this part was laughable – “weird-ass music that no one has ever heard of or cares about, really makes him that unique.”
Anyone who knows anything about independent culture would understand that wearing Salvation Army clothing is a cultural statement and that most styles of clothing from major manufacturers like Abercrombie and Fitch or The Gap are imitations of this initial cultural movement, meaning that the clothing most people wear is an imitation of independent culture on which emo kids have had a very strong influence.
The earlier point that “Emo kids make no societal contribution” is negated by the fact that they make a strong cultural contribution and that what they achieve through academics or through the workforce cannot be assumed. The funniest part of the article was “Is life really that hard, lil’ emo kid? Maybe if your parents put you up for adoption, then you would be justified in being emo.”
First of all, nobody in our free society has to provide a cultural justification for the particular subculture in which they choose to participate. Second, just because many emo kids are born into prominent and affluent communities does not mean they have an obligation to get out on the dance floor, rave, listen to Britney Spears-type pop hell, grind their crotches against females while listening to hip hop or listen to bland and hook-laden corporate rock.
I personally think of emo as being a response to a lack of emotion in the modern world. Emo kids lament the death of romance, while screamo kids scream about it. I believe these kids are looking for a way to feel again in a society that seems to be leaving so many people disaffected. Sure, many may think that the music they choose to listen to is overly sensitive, but then I always assumed that attacking people for the way they present themselves to the world should have ended in high school. I guess I was wrong.
It is this writer’s opinion that bullying people through an article in a paper is juvenile. I say “bullying” because I think the article latched onto what I feel is an inclination in popular culture to hate on emo kids.
Our country is founded on free speech, but we as a society make an important distinction between free speech and hate speech. Attacking emo kids for self-expression seems to embody that point.

Monday, August 20, 2007

Школа Виктория -за победы за которые мы поделимс

Школа Виктория -за победы за которые мы поделимс

well, it's just Victoria School- For Victories We Share Yet

wayne's friend translated it. i love russian and most of the european (esp. the east) languages. german is lovely too.

anyway, i'm still considering my options.
(A) QUIT NOW
(B) RETAIN
(C) DO MY A LEVELS, THEN GO POLY
(D) QUIT IN APRIL NEXT YEAR
(E) DO MY A LEVELS, THEN GO ON WITH LIFE

haha, anyway, option c is pretty viable from an array of views. one, i have something to fall back on if i screw up poly. two, i might change my mind then. three, i will be armed in both arenas, and show that i chose to go this route and not because i couldn't make it.

anyway, still considering.

Wednesday, August 15, 2007

Self-Actualisation

this following letter of sorts was supposedly intended for my parents, a phase of my plan to get me out of SA, where in that case i would spam this letter to my parents' inboxes. anyway, while still in the midst of my consideration, i decided to publish my thoughts, or rather self-discourse, to allow opinions and the generation of ideas. hah. i do expect a result that's in favor of staying though. yes, it's self-indulgent, but then again, what do you expect during PW? pay attention? i do know it's so pseudo-cheem, so please lay off the flak that i don't sound the same as in person. maybe 'cos i don't (i) talk to you that much, (ii) i'm not so fake, or (iii) i assumed you wouldn't understand. [the three clauses don't apply to my dear friend George, for totally different reasons of course]. anyway, it was just some form of clarification of my reason to leave (still considering heavily). and yes it's a wee (really) little exaggeration.


Dear mom and dad (and self).

This note is regarding my utmost and innermost desire to leave the formalized institution of St. Andrews Junior College to pursue my dream of Visual Communications in either Laselle College or the Nanyang Academy of Fine Arts. For the past 4 months of junior college, I’ve had a terribly miserable experience due to the rigidness and lack of expression in this system. For want of sounding childish/ungrateful/naïve, I do believe my place of education lies in that of the Fine Arts. Rather than the institutionalized system and curriculum of examinations, tests and such, I do rather that of creative exploration by which I discover and harness my talents in art. The time spent in SA, I do truly feel, have been a wasted one, by which I suffer from intense pressures to do well in an otherwise constrictive and strangling manner. The subjects I take do not deliver any joy – Economics, History and Literature, in the sense that they lack intellectual engagement and are very much stoic and rigid in their form. The formality of such chokes my thought and self, threatening to engulf my own identity and person. The freedom and yet teaching in the Arts Colleges will allow me to grow both as a person and an artist, to do so, is to take a step closer to my dreams and ambitions. The exciting prospects of such do allow me some relief. The absolute dread and loathing I feel in relation to school and its associates allow me no joy, rather a dead existence that trudges along on sheer will and the lack of choice. Please do hear my pleas and cries for the emancipation of my person from the shackles of SA. This is by far, not an exaggeration nor a ungrateful plea from a brat, but rather a request to be the shining light that delivers from the evil one, the helping hand that frees me form my strongholds. In all, please do hear my cry from the depths of these god-forsaken pits, and grant my dear and sincere request.



Yours faithfully, sincerely and always, your loving son and physical body,

Em.


SAVE THE STUDENTS!

(funnily, i would rather be going to Temasek Poly's Visual Comm.)(it really doesn't make sense for me to stay: if i'm going to do the course after A Levels, then why wait?)

Thursday, August 09, 2007

i must admit my taste in music has taken a revamp. happy, no?

Song Covers and the like.

haha it's the youtube fever.

beautiful song, beautiful girl, beautiful voice. the original "These Walls" was sung by Teddy Geiger.


i know Christmas ain't here yet, but this song and his voice is too hard to pass up. Winter Wonderland covered by Jason Mraz.


the original main man. yes, it's jason mraz fever. this song is pretty nice too. the Beauty in Ugly by HIM. "You'll make all the fashion statements, by just dressing up your mind."


okay okay, last one. everything bout this cover/video is so apt, from the intro to the lyrics. Life IS wonderful.(the background harmony is pretty nice, too bad it's so little)

when we'll all so unsure, so confused, we start off a little wary. but in the middle of it all, we get so caught up in the circle of life, and things start to get going. and we end on a high.

Monday, August 06, 2007

I'm Yours (and I'm Not Okay)

i just love this song to bits. (the lyrics is below)

the original. the harmony is so so so good.


this cover is really good, and she's quite a looker too.



I’m Yours by Jason Mraz

Well, you done done me and you bet I felt it
I tried to be chill but your so hot that i melted
I fell right through the cracks, and i'm tryin to get back
before the cool done run out i'll be givin it my best test
and nothin's gonna stop me but divine intervention
I reckon it's again my turn to win some or learn some

I won't hesitate no more,
no more, it cannot wait i'm yours

Well open up your mind and see like me
open up your plans and damn you're free
look into your heart and you'll find love love love
listen to the music at the moment maybe sing with me
Ah, la peaceful melody
It's your god forsaken right to be loved loved loved loved Loved

So, i won't hesitate no more,
no more, it cannot wait i'm sure
there's no need to complicate our time is short
this is our fate, i'm yours

*scat*

I've been spendin' way too long checkin' my tongue in the mirror
and bendin' over backwards just to try to see it clearer
my breath fogged up the glass
and so I drew a new face and laughed
I guess what I'm a sayin' is there ain't no better reason
to rid yourself of vanity and just go with the seasons
it's what we aim to do
our name is our virtue

I won't hesitate no more, no more
it cannot wait, i'm sure
(there's no need to complicate
our time is short
it cannot wait, i'm yours 2x


no please don't complicate, our time is short
this is our fate, im yours.
no please don't hesitate no more, no more
it cannot wait, the sky is yours!)

well open up your mind and see like me
open up your plans and damn you're free
look into your heart and you'll find love love love love
listen to the music of the moment come and dance with me
ah, la one big family
it's your god forsaken right to be loved, loved, loved, loved
open up your mind and see like me
open up your plans and damn you're free
look into your heart and you'll find love love love love
listen to the music of the moment come and dance with me
ah, la happy family
it's our god forsaken right to be loved loved loved loved
listen to the music of the moment come and dance with me
ah, la peaceful melodies
it's you god forsaken right to be loved loved loved loved...



ps: please do NOT ask me "are you okay?" when i'm quite obviously am not. either you are plain numb or dumb (read: insensitivity off the charts).on a happier note, i still like this song.

Monday, July 30, 2007

all's well that end's well: it's been a long time-coming

(this space has been UNdisclaimed)

well, i'm finally back. to say the least, it's been a long ride since yesteryears (while just a few months, but in relation to the period of my existence, it's quite long okay), a whole lot of shit, poop, faeces and any other synonym that's got to do with excretement.

well, to all uninitiated (new favorite word), i've been inducted into the ranks of the 30th Student Council, as a member of the Executive Committee, namely being the assistant HEAD OF FUNCTIONS (i do try to ignore the first few words). from then, it all went downhill. for fear of sounding ungrateful (or rather the sorry little brat, that i actually am), i will try to keep the complaints out of the picture. in other words, your ears are gonna be pretty sore, that is, if i do know you at all. not that i haven't had any fun or anything (not much actually), but it's rather i for one don't see myself fitting for the job itself. me? i mean, i could deal with job scope yadayada, but me as a student leader? didn't see that one coming, eh VS?

well, there certainly has been progression. i mean, from the initial stages of a complete outright rejection of joining the student council to EXCO, that's quite a big leap in both faith(?) and heart, doncha think? well, it's truly (and highly likely) God's plan, as in every aspect, i am the pre-determined, divined (read: accidental) councilor. WATER POLO, call me back.(silence rebounds). oh well, in all fairness, i mean council isn't that bad, other than the fact that i've never been stressed for anything school-related or for anything for a matter of fact. till i joined SA and council. case in point: i was out for lunch (sorta) with Mdm. Nabilah, her daughter, and George. we were semi-complaining to her, and she remarked that it was the first time she's ever seen me stressed. i mean was it the pimples on my face? (damn pimples!) it's so scary that it's not even funny. i mean, i was feeling more stressed for the Common Test than my O Levels.

well, you ask, what the hell? yes, i admit that i've a rather low tolerance for stress when it does comes, meaning once every 17 years (seen in the trend thus far).for everything else, there's "erm, okay, so?", my generally favorite apathetic mindest.

well, what's the difference then? well, you got me stumped there.i guess i'm growing up, finally facing commitment (hell, i said to my friend today that i wouldn't quit school cause it would be, omg, irresponsible). i mean, i am free from my phobia? for the longest time, i've never been able to carry an interest (of sorts) for longer than a year. CCAs, relationships, you name it. maybe because i'm kinda trapped in between the shame of quitting and the unwillingness of the teachers to kick people out. i mean, the only solution is retaining. and we don't want that, do we? well, i guess, after all this boo-hoo crap, it's just me growing up after all. a new life, a new perspective (seeing life in bright colors now, for i am mr sunshine), and a new positivity. maybe it's just because i had a good day today. well, one thing's for sure, we could have all the maybes in the world, but i don't want to be a "may be a (insert occupation/post/etc.)", i want to be somebody. (how utterly vague and unhelpful as well, but it does sound motivational, no?)

well, in all, all's well that end's well. beating round the bush hasn't been a favorite pastime, so let's skip to the end with a summary, that finally, and i do mean finally, little boy blue, with all his shortcomings, commitment phobia(s), lamentings, and psuedo-emoness, has finally grown up into mr sunshine. well, as said by Jason Hahn as said by someone else, it's all about positive thinking.

well. (the frog has left the building)

Monday, April 02, 2007

THIS AIN'T A SCENE, IT'S A GODAMMNED ARMS RACE

THE EMO-LUTION

this post is going to be long due to pent up feelings of outrage ( and all its connotations) on the following issue. DISCLAIMER, do not read if you're narrow-minded and prejudiced against the emo culture. i'm not an Emo fanatic, neither am i an advocate of some of its beliefs and actions. i'm just another teenager of Gen Y who believes in freedom of choice for individuality and personality ( no, i'm not a hippie).

as every literate person in singapore will "know" by now, emo equals bad. wait a minute. so now we're labelling emoness as a bad culture which we should exterminate? what happened to pre-marital sex, promiscuity, homosexuality(not saying its bad) and etc.? i mean, you guys do that right? so why condemn us? aren't we the lesser evil? we don't leave, erm, stuff behind, we don't break hearts, we don't scar people for lives, we don't even talk to you. so why now the outcry for emo-termination?

reading the reports after articles about the emo culture in singapore, i couldn't but help act the critic for the critic.

in the Straits Times, dated 2 April 2007 in the YouthInk forum (pg H7) , Ms. Jessica Lim wrote an article entitled " Emo heroes: Just a bunch of zeroes". basically "commenting" on the new type of heroes, the EMO HERO. the man in question here is none other than Michael Scofield aka Wentworth Miller of Prison Break fame. first up for dissection, the Emo Hero isn't a recent phenomenon. in modern and not so modern literature, we deem him the anti-hero, a main character in a dramatic or narrative work who is characterized by a lack of traditional heroic qualities, such as idealism or courage as defined by dictionary.com . this anti-hero labels ties in with your description of Scofield - "As a character, he is after all, awkward, anti-social, self-alienated, cruel, obnoxious or selfish". okay, now we question, what's so bad about the anti-hero/Emo Hero? You say the Emo Hero is "getting tedious and cliched". FYI, your characterisation of Scofield is obviously limited and viewed narrowedly. i mean come on, awkward? harry potter, a quintessential hero (who displayed and displays traditional hero qualities such as courage, etc.) was an awkward one as well. at least Rowling managed to humanise him. in the same way, Scofield, who is not just "awkward, anti-social, etc", he is more than that. otherwise, he's just another one-dimensional fictional construct. before you clamour that i'm being biased, lets swing over to the other spectrum, where Scofield is a "delinquent". anti-social behaviour, check ( though i'm not so sure about that. i mean socialising in prison? he was romancing Sara!) , self-alienated, check, and selfish, check. i'm sorry. while trying to maintain objectiveness, the fact that this claim to be " a bad person" ( as you make the Emo Hero out to be, correct me if i'm wrong) because of such qualities just seem like such a lame attempt. i mean for crying out loud, your description is based on a man stuck in a prison filled with hooligans and gangsters who first don't care for socialising ( in the way we non-prison attendees define it, not that we're socially different), and second care about being humble. but credit for crediting him obnoxiousness anyway because in the episode of "Brothers Keepers", he was quite proud towards Lincoln. but that lasted for an episode only. anyway, for self-alienated and selfish, forgive me if i'm wrong, aren't they quite contradictory? but hey if self-alienated is the same as low self-worth, then you hit the nail on the spot. however, this is mainly due to feelings of abandonment in his youth. but this also makes him more sympathetic to others suffering if you paid close attention when the doc was going on about his lower latent inhibition. so there, we kinda summed up the character of the Emo Hero based on Michael Scofield. is he such a bad person? according to who? by what values? and that leads us to your statement, " Meet Gen Y's role model: the emo hero". okay, so let us (or rather just me) clarify somethings. Gen Y as in youths, teenagers? like aged between 13-20? okay so now, (since YOU used Prison Break, we shall continue using Prison Break as the example) the director of Prison Break (PB), is Paul Scheuring born 1968, so he would be 38 at the time of PB's premier which was in 2005. Now, he's not really of Gen Y is he? so would it be a correct term to use the Emo Hero as our role model? according to who? anyway looking at PB's demographics, it caters to a more mature and adult audience. from wikipedia, which may be a little dubious, "Due to its storyline and setting, Prison Break's target audience is the 18-34 age group. The show contains adult content including violence, coarse language, sexual and drug references." So would it be a better description to call it our P65's (excluding the non-working Gen Y) role model instead? unless you yourself are above such a role model?

in the article, it ( lets not be personal here) also says that " He may be cute, brainy and kind. Unfortunately, he is also a bit dumb". wait. the last time i checked, brainy (intelligent, clever) was quite the opposite of dumb (stupid; dull-witted). hmm, the paradoxical hero now? as claimed by the article. as caption, it said " Forget Superman or Luke Skywalker. The new teen 'hero' is a tattoo-sporting convict. Shudder". okay so now we're condemning tattoos, convicts or both? now we're on dangerous territory with the convict issue. so we can't give him a second chance? a convict can't be a hero? another famed "convict" is xXx agent Xander Cage played by Vin Diesel who plays convict-turned-hero. so he's bad too? okay now for the former. tattoos are bad. though deemed to be gangsterish and with all its associations, tattooing oneself is all too common-place.

you also talk about how "dumb" it is for the tattoo to be on his torso and should rather be on his thighs. now wait for a minute and think. THINK. it's a television drama. it's not porn firstly. putting on his thighs might lead to over-exposure of unnecessary viewing. okay, so you say that it can be easily solved by underwear ( i mean don't you see the trend of the shy hollywood man who is adverse to showing too much down there?) anyway, look at the proportion of his entire torso versus his upper thighs?would it fit firstly? he would also still need to "swivel his head at a mirror" to look behind his thighs anyway. anyway, why are you so uptight about the tattoo anyway, its not as if he has not enough time to look at them, so does it really hurt to swivel?

"Yes it makes good TV. But 30 years ago, that same scenario might never become the hit of today". We're in 2007.

"Wholesome, toothsome and brimming with hope, that generation would have baulked at a character like Scofield, instead of accepting as role model". You quote Star Wars's Luke Skywalker. but what about Han Solo who has his legions of fans as well. he's quite the Emo Hero based on his selfishness stemmed from survival ( quite similar to Michael Scofield). Han Solo is not exactly from our era is he?

" So great is our attraction to the emo hero that even his giving up of a great career and a posh apartment - in other words, everything he's worked for - may be forgiven". and so leave his innocent brother to die unjustly?so the great value of self-sacrifice is now being questioned? people sympathise and respect one who is willing to give up his all for his loved one. people cannot be earned, or gained, once dead, they're gone. money, riches, or in this case a great career and a posh apartment can always be attained again. they are temporal.

" To our credit, we identify with this emo hero because we feel shunned by ' the establishment"'. True. who doesn't identify with the underdog? who doesn't identify with the one is being persecuted despite being "right"? who has never misunderstood?

"But does it go too far when we are known for being so 'emo' that we are willing to destroy ourselves in more outlandish ways than our predecessors". so you justify destroying ourselves? i'm sorry if i misunderstood, but are you saying that we are supposed, expected to destroy ourselves? just that now, our Gen Y (not counting the fact of PB's demographics but rather the emo culture) is destroying ourselves in an outlandish manner? either that i'm really dumb or that sentence doesn't make sense whatsoever. i assume you are referring to self-mutilation and suicide. true, we are might be going too far. but are we going to question one's morals now? see suicide and emo-ing are pretty different even though their paths do tend to cross regularly. Emo, as in being emotional, is more than just depression. we don't just kill ourselves? i believe, and hope you respect by believing this, that we're more rational and sane than that. the minority (though increasing) of suicidal people have always been there. through different fads, different appearances, they have always been there. this following excerpt is taken from the National Youth Council of Singapore's website :
"TEEN SUICIDES : RELATIONSHIP PROBLEMS THE MAIN CAUSE OF FRICTION with parents and breaking up with boyfriends or girlfriends are the main factors that push Singapore's under-20s over the edge. Not so stress over school grades. In only three of the 28 youth suicides in 2001 was it a possible trigger, according to a study by three doctors. One was a nine-year-old girl. The figures debunk the popular perception that pressure to do well in school is driving Singapore's young to the brink. They also show that (a) more boys than girls (16 against 12) commit suicide (b) all jumped off high-rise residential blocks (c) almost half (13) were school dropouts, and (d) three-quarters were aged between 14 and 19, with the youngest aged nine. But the figures do not indicate a trend, said Dr Daniel Fung, adding that the annual average in the past five years is 20 youths." though this article was written in 2003, the Emo culture had already begun its revolution. if not under the guise of relational problems, we have peer pressure, stress and what-have-you-nots.

" How did we become so repulsed by the image of being upstanding, hopeful, wholesome - or even toothsome - that we don't know which way is up any more". Up as according to who? cultural perception? i believe this repulsion has always been there. anti-establishment is not a new fad. sure, being "upstanding, etc." are all good values and all. but how about your self-righteousness and pseudo perfection. the main bulk of Emo Kids despair against the hypocrisy and for lack of better word, self-righteousness of you mainstream adults, our actual supposed role models. rather than give us hope, you paint the world shades of black and grey, bleak existence by your double standards and all your plasticness. yes call us "angst-filled youths" but remember, at least we're living our lives truly and we're not the kettles calling the pot black.

"Maybe we aren't calling delinquency what it is: bad for you, attention seeking and not very clever". So now we're referring the Emo culture as delinquency? okay so lets define juvenile delinquency - behavior of a child or youth that is so marked by violation of law, persistent mischievousness, antisocial behavior, disobedience, or intractability as to thwart correction by parents and to constitute a matter for action by the juvenile courts. no where in its definition does it say being emotional, cutting oneself (not that i'm condoning it) or being depressed? it is none of it. now your definition, of it being bad. its quite subjective isn't it. to you, the self-righteous outside, looking down from your ivory tower, you look at us with disdain and pity that we're wasting our lives away. but we look up to you and feel sorry for you, that you are so unaware and so caged in by your narrowness and prejudice. attention-seeking, now that's a term that keeps coming up in articles tacking this issue. you say we're attention-seeking. who isn't? do you even know of us. not wanting to sound the typical teenage rebel who implores misunderstanding, your views of us being attention-seeking seem just a lame provocation to stir us out of our Emoness to prove you wrong. and so? we didn't raise the issue. we were pretty fine the way we were. if were attention-seeking of any sort, do you think we would seek it from you? the establishment? or our parents? i'm sure your opinion ( on our issues) matter to us. if were attention seeking at all, we would be seeking one another's attention rather. call it a pity-party or whatever, who are you to judge? your limited view on how people should be behave and treat one another is rather moralistic and based on convention. i know you think we're such a sad, sorry case, but forgive me for sounding harsh, you do too.

"What's so wrong with being a bona fide good guy anyway?" Now we wouldn't want it to be "getting tedious and cliched" would we?

and lastly, " Can't a hero be cute, brainy, kind - and smart?'' Well, perfection is so yesterday.

haha, i just heard that Wentworth Miller is gay. haha, new discussion?

AGAIN?

before i start rambling, i would like one and all to know that i've (well i try to tell myself that i did on purpose, not otherwise) "reformatted" my MP3 and "going through a period of musical self-discovery". right now, theres only the crooner James Morrison who has really lame lyrics and the real poets, Fall Out Boy, who has really great lyrics, but sound so poppish now. oh well, so if you have any good music worth my two seconds, pass it on alright.

anyway, school has been great if you're wondering. other than the fact that i feel like a outsider in my class. sure i have my "friends" and sure i can talk to the others, but why does it feel so wierd and empty? aargh? anyway, school work has been piling up, literally. the work we get nowadays if a far cry from those good old days in VS (not that we bothered about homework anyway). talking about VS gets me really riled up. i mean co-ed, AGAIN? haven't we been there and done that? well, george is going for the OVA forum and i hope that all goes well, well as in NO GIRLS ALLOWED. sexist as you may say, i believe strongly in boy school pride and all that. i'm sure you understand.

Sunday, March 11, 2007

Yours Truly, The Talented Mr Eckley

Well, i'm in St. Andrews.

Funny how SA never seemed to be a choice at all. the course code seemed to appear out of nowhere and formed by the idea that SA's uniform was the nicest. oh well. for all the people who assumed, and here i assume, and had faith in me to be posted to VJ, here's a apology budded out of an inexplicable feeling of nothing. absolutely nothing.

i thought i would be devastated. i thought i would be angry. i thought wrong.

Funny how it just seemed to pass like day and night. unpredictable but not unexpected.

Funny how i feel fake when i say "it's alright, SA is quite good also", but feel as if i mean it.

oh well.

SA has been a blast thus far. Day 1 was hellishly boring. mainly admin, we had tests after tests. i went for the KI test, which was at the same time as the Art aptitude test. appartently in SA, KI and Art is too much of a workload to be put in the same subject combination. thus i've to resort to Lit. , Hist, Math and KI. yes, i got in.

the KI test was wierd. questions like " Is the King of France really bald" and "Is snow white" got me stumped and thinking. other questions broached existentialism - does the table exist? while others were pretty normal, asking why i wanted to take KI.

the interview was the next day and we had saner questions that actually made sense. thank god i got through without blurting out that i was actually crapping around.

well the orientation ended with a muted boom from disco night. telling myself that if i wanted to club i rather be in a proper club, i refrained from boogying away and looking retarded like the many in the crowd. looking at george from afar, i couldn't help but chuckle. but still i felt fake.

come on. why the conflict within?

even my words come out fake. "oh no thanks its alright." and "i'm alright. just a little tired" aren't really what they are. just smokescreens for a dragon waking from its repose. anger. sadness.

oh well.

Friday, March 02, 2007

SRJC ALL FOR YOU, YOUR CALL IS OURS TOO.

somehow the blogging bug has bitten.

to start off this part, i would like to say this is the 22nd post for this blog. say whoopee.

have you ever realised that most blogskins are either too gay to function or too feminine, which in essence are much the same thing? somebody say sexist!

over this past few days, i've come to realise a milestone in my life. i like grey! though seemingly unimportant and unsignificant to the uninitiated, i do realise that has marked a point in my short life that i've begun to mellow with age. come on, don't laugh man. i know it might sound absurd to your disbelieving ears that thats even finitely possible, but i swear i'm pulling your leg. okay, so i've nothing better to do but you still got Punk'd. i do like grey though.hee. [i think its possible that i'm becoming schizo]

today being the second last day of first three months does seem a tad bit boring. coupled with the fact with the melodramatic downpour outside my window adding to this emoness, i stop and think, and go into narrative reminscing the good and the bad, and the ugly (cue rat-face) of it all.

for all those who weren't in SR for the three months, this is the point you might actually wanna to stop reading due to its expicit content, kidding. actually more like cause some of the stuff are inside jokes. however if you would like to stay tuned, you might get a glimpse at how much SR rocks, albeit a rather confusing glimpse. in short this is sort of goodbye.
To say the least, SR has been loads of fun. To all 1A01 kids, thanks. As much as i hate to be cliched, thanks for all the good memories of :
1. ponning lessons in favour of staring at each other wordlessly, hoping that a spark of excitement might dispell the cloud of boredom stubbornly and unfairly clinging around us.
2. making fun of one another. actually just Nat ( too pretty beefcake?) and the Rat-face ( or enthu-rep. if you wish). i swear i was nice.
3. the educating experience of an animal farm in our homeroom, the one and only renassaince room. kudos to John for being so vocally talented at animal mimicry. you sure you're pure human?
4. the wonderful creatures we call teachers. first we have, of course, ms tammy thiang who i believe is a great teacher. (notice the bland and uninteresting description? me no want to get into trouble) next of course, we have to mention our dashing co-civics tutor with goldfish lips who is actually quite lame (humor-wise) despite being a valedictorian for his cohort. and also for the whole man-in-black thing. third we of course have stephen tay who is actually a really great teacher. for once we have a teach who knows his facts. other than the fact of course he looks like the one-eyed alien from lilo and stitch. fourth, we have nat's mum-in-law and teacher of my favorite subject- chinese. all you chinks so yeah. okay lame. anyway, Mrs Phay, who is a member of the discipline commitee ( say wooh) is actually pretty okay cause she's kinda oblivious to me and nat either skipping lessons or sleeping in them. [tuck in your shirt mas]. what would ever do without teachers? we would all die due to the fact that our attire is messy due to the fact that our shirts are untucked by a fraction.
5. to ningles whose actual schizo (i suspect) mind never fails to entertain and to depress.hee.
6. to liz whose hyperventilating laughter and predisposition to Rat-face makes a great live comedy.
7. to nat for being such a great friend and for looking so pretty. hee.
8. to syafiq for being dyslexic.
9. to shawn the f*cktard for being the infinite gentleman you are. i have great respect for you man.
10. to john for being such an entertainer. remember me when you get famous alright. either as a animal tv show host or mr philip tan's successor.
11. to mas who is probably the only who's gonna get all the jokes cause you're the only one left reading, thanks, erm, for reading still? hah, really thanks for good memories as temporary BFF.

and to the others in 1A01 who have played a role in defining SR as such a great place. thanks.

the only bad memory, if you're wondering, is probably shaving off my precious mohawk. till we cut again.

if you're a non-SRJCian and still reading, wow, i'm impressed.

Wednesday, February 28, 2007

Full Circle

its a couple of days before the JAE results, and seriously i'm shaking.

to all you elitist bastards, f*ck off and go to hell cause SR is a good school despite its less-than-stellar cut off points. don't give me that condescending look.

anyway, on a happier note, congrats to all 4Eians for your results.

short is good, no?

Friday, February 09, 2007

OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

finally you say, that lazy emmanuel has woken up from his lazy repose and started to blogging again. haha. my ever loyal supporters and feeders

as you all probably know by now, the O results are out and i'm proud to announce my startling and spectacular achievement of 9! Well it was a definite surprise. Like OMG kind of surprise. So thank God! for because without Him, this grade would definitely have a one in front of it.

well, so now the all important deicison would be either VJ or SR. its quite funny seeing the reactions of people when i tell them i'm considering SR and with all their elitist stares, they grab me by my shirt and tell me i'm crazy (hint hint to some physics teacher). and my favourite catchphrase for this season is [ get out of my elite and uncaring face]. how cool is that. hah. yes, laugh at me. mock me.fine

anyway. school thus far has been really great. for the record i'm in canoeing. swimming in sr really sucks; the swimmers are all so white. and rugby, well, do i look like i can take rugby? haha, no thanks shafiq. the people in my class rock man. kudos to Ning, Nat, Suiliz, John and Shawn and many others who make class interesting and fun. oh man, i sound like a teacher.

anyway, thats bout as much my morning brain can squeeze out. so tada and till next time.

PS: Hey all 1A01 peeps, CG dinner is now lunch next thurs at 2. Meet at orchard mrt in your finest formal cause after lunch we'll be going for the play thing alright.

Sunday, January 07, 2007

And The First Week. 2007

and the first three days have passed. it seemed like forever. thank god there were nice people (cue Gonorrhea and Syphillis) cause in comparison to VS's campus, SR's really times ten to the power of infinity (drumroll) worse. the orientation games were uberly boring. for example, for the very first game, we played the name game and wacko. they are actually not bad icebreakers, but the speed and MO of playing just bored the hell out of me. just picture people walking matrix-style over to called person to "whack" the other guy. whatever.
the school has no color sense at all. its facade outside is horribly yellow, pink and green. and everyone seems to be poor condition. i miss VS. even more horrible, is that even though VS's food really sucked, SR's worse. like bad.

anyway, enough of waxing lyrical bout my new school for the next three months, its only salvation is the people. wierdly enough, there are pretty girls there. though they kinda all look alike, yes, they were pretty.

subject combinations choosing was on friday and since it was just for three months, i decided to take something altogether advant garde. my first choice was Lit., Hist. and Art, with a H1 maths. so together with Deb., we're keeping our fingers crossed for that combi to be accepted. as for the matter of CCA, it would be probably Rugby or Swimming. okay so maybe i'm not rugby body type, well i can be a winger. so i won't be tackling any large asses any time soon okay. swimming yah, but i kinda think SR's swim team is kinda lousy. anyway, anything goes as long as its fun.

and so ends the first week of the new year and new school term. cheers to a better week and better school

Erebus Oi!PS: i have to like freaking wake up at 5.30 man.